Misc.

Oh the holidays, what to say. Expectations are high and the grandparents are higher on that forced holiday cheer, which you may or may not share. But fear not, you can now buy these trademarked candles and get into the season via the nose holes. Nothing seals the holiday feel like the stench, er uh— sweet smell.

Pretend to Give a Shit Holiday Candle

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3-1/4" tall glass ornament
A less than regal looking cat
Derpy means silly-looking
Comes with string for hanging

Derpy Cat Ornament

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Glass ornament
2" diameter
Expresses disbelief in a supreme being
Festive

Atheist Ornament

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Set of 3 glass ornaments
Each is 2" in diameter
Three famous existentialists celebrate Christmas
Sure to dampen the world's joy

Existential Ornament Set of 4

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Yeti Holiday Ornament

Yeti Holiday Ornament

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Realistic Latex Wolf Mask
Wolf is always in howling position
Eye-holes are in the neck
Fits most adult heads

Wolf Latex Mask

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Realistic praying mantis head
Giant shiny eyes
You supply the praying arms
Probably our best mask for silent lurking

Praying Mantis Latex Mask

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Mask makes you look like a guinea pig
Made of latex
Fits most adult heads
Giant water bottle not included

Guinea Pig Latex Mask

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4-1/4"" tall air freshener
Features a beautiful unicorn
Makes your commute magical
Smells like cotton candy

Unicorn Air Freshener - Cotton Candy Scent

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4-3/4" tall air freshener
Microscopic creature made huge
Includes string for hanging
Smells like green apples

Tardigrade Air Freshener - Green Apple Scent

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4-3/4" tall air freshener
Features Krampus
The anti-Santa Claus
Smells like cinnamon

Krampus Air Freshener - Cinnamon Scent

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Illuminati Air Freshener - Hegemony Scented

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